All is Q on New Year’s Day…

The title is (for the benefit of the younger readers) a line from a U2 song from 1983. I omitted the rest of the “Q” word out if respect for the emergency workers who are on shift.

Basically, the main purpose of this post is to wish everyone, ambulance crews and not, a happy and unbusy transition period, from 2018 into 2019.

I’ve spoken of suicide season before, this is the time when some people can’t face another year of despair and misery. But it’s also a time when people see the opportunity to start afresh.

A few years ago, when I first left the Ambulance Service, I had a very difficult year where people I’d considered friends and colleagues turned their backs on me, and much more. I began to write my thoughts down during the sleepless nights and it actually helped me to find that there are actually positives in life, if you look for them.

I thought now might be a good time to share those thoughts, not because I think they’re necessarily right (they are simply my thoughts regarding my life), but because I hope they might help other people to make their own evaluations on their lives.

There are a lot of observations regarding friends, but that’s actually intentional and for a good reason. Friends are very important, but you are very much important as a friend to them too.

Here goes:

“201X was an educational year, and here are a few of the things I learned plus some I’ve relearned. There is no particular order, other than as things came to me. They also apply to no specific people, although some were prompted by things that happened. None are advice, all are my personal take on life:

I’ve earned that, if someone takes hours, or even days, to respond to a message, they may just be busy or I might not be as high on their list of priorities as I thought. But that’s ok.

I’ve learned that some “friends” are happy to be around when things are fine, but aren’t interested when you need them. They’re actually not friends.

I’ve learned that some people find it easier to ignore you, rather than act like adults and admit that they might actually have been wrong as well and talk it over. That’s ok too.

I’ve learned that sometimes, dropping someone a short message or a call, just to say “hi” can mean the world to them, instead of just “thinking about contacting them” or hoping that someone else will.

I’ve learned that it’s good to be spontaneous sometimes. Climb that tree, tell that person they have a lovely smile or nice eyes…. Why does it matter what strangers think? Who knows, you might make someone happy, or even make their day.

I’ve learned that true friends never go away, sometimes they’re just waiting in the wings for you to get in touch.

I’ve learned that new friends come from unexpected areas, and that real friends will climb that tree with you.

I’ve learned that true friendship is not, and never has been in any way whatsoever, connected to any social media “friends”list, and anyone who thinks otherwise is not a true friend.

I’ve learned that some people are happy to accept your help, but not willing to return the favour when you need theirs, but that’s ok too because there are always going to be friends who are.

I’ve learned that you should stand up for your rights. No person or organisation is big enough to beat honesty and trust when they’re in the wrong. It’s just a matter of time.

But, most of all, I’ve learned that, despite the negative things that happen in life, there are always positive things too. Newton’s Third Law states – For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. Sometimes the positive reaction is difficult to see, but good friends can help you with that.”

Here’s to 2019, where we might not get what we want, but I hope we all get what we need.

Have a happy and safe New Year!